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What's Up Weddings

Wedding Invitation Etiquette

Sep 05, 2012 05:21PM ● By Anonymous

When should I send out my invitations?

Before invitations, the first step is save the dates, which typically go out between six to eight months before the wedding. These are usually cute cards with pictures of you and your fiancée, reminding people to (literally) save the date of your wedding into their calendar so they can be sure to attend. For a traditional wedding, the typical grace period is between six to eight weeks before the wedding; this gives your guests ample time to make plans, get gifts together, and get everything in order for your day. If you're planning a destination wedding, the grace period extends to about three months; this gives your guests time to rearrange their schedules, buy plane tickets, and set aside time to really enjoy their time away with you.

When should I set my deadline for RSVPs?

The best time to ask for RSVPs is two to three weeks before your wedding. This time frame allows for time to get the final seating chart arranged, as well as giving the final head count to the caterer. If your guests haven't responded by your RSVP date, be sure to give them a call and remind them to send it in to you. You want to make sure you have the RSVP by whatever way you've requested it (by mail, by email, by phone...) so you know with certainty who is coming and who should be accounted for when all is said and done.

How can I include my wedding website information?

A popular new trend in the wedding world is to set up a wedding website; that is, a website devoted to all things you and your fiancée. Your website could include information such as how you met, your proposal story, pictures of you, details about your wedding, where you'll be living... If you want to share your wedding website information with your guests, the best way is to include it on the save the date cards. A simple line stating the URL will do, or you can label it and make it more obvious. If you overlook putting it on the save the dates, the other option is to put an insert with your invites; this would be a little card that slips into the invitation envelope that states your wedding website URL.

Should I include where we're registered on our invitation?

It isn't customary to put your registries on the invitations as this makes it seem like you're asking for gifts. One way to bypass this is to make sure your wedding party knows where you're registered and encourage them to spread the word should your guests ask. Another way to bypass seeming rude is to make a section on your wedding website; a simple tab listing your registries will do the trick

 How do I specify a dress code?

To make sure your guest know the preferred dress code of your wedding, a small mention in the lower right hand corner of your invite will do the trick. Black-tie, cocktail wear, or casual wear are all possibilities. Your guests will also pick up the vibe from what type of invitation you send; a fancier invitation will imply a fancier dress code; a more playful invitation will imply a more relaxed dress code.

Do I have to include "plus one" invites for all my guests?

Absolutely not. If you know your friend is in a serious relationship it is courteous to extend a "plus one" to your friend's significant other. However, every invitation you send out is money you're spending for an extra seat. If adding those extra plus ones will break your bank and send you over budget, don't stress about it. If your friend happens to RSVP for two, give them a call and explain that you just can't invite everyone, and a lot of guests will not be bringing an extra guest.

How do I specify that my wedding is adult-only?

The easiest way to specify that the wedding is not kid appropriate or kid friendly is to address the invitations specifically to each guest. If you think there may still be some confusion, have your wedding party spread the word if you think they'll be in contact with the guests that need to be reached. If not, you can always call your guests and explain to them the situation. If you want to go out of your way, you can go as far as suggesting a babysitter to watch the kids while your guests are celebrating with you.